"A saint is a person who practices the keystone human virtue of humility. Humility in the face of wealth and plenty, humility in the face of hatred and violence, humility in the face of strength, humility in the face of your own genius or lack of it, humility in the face of another's humility, humility in the face of love and beauty, humility in the face of pain and death. Saints are driven to humbling themselves before all the splendor and horrow of the world because they perceive there to be something divine in it, something pulsing and alive beneath the hard dead surface of material things, something inconceivably greater and purer than they". Father Joe, Tony Hendra

Since I have graduated college I have been privy to two aspects of God. The aspect of compassion and the aspect of humility are the two attributes I have been immersed in.

I asked for humility and I have been reiceving my dose every day for the last eighteen months. As I right this I feel that the humility I have experienced cannot be conveyed in words, and I worry that I am inflating my own storry to fan my pride. I pray that this is not the case. God has given me every day to get up and serve. To take on a life of humilty. But, these lessons don't start with action. I feel my heart has been torn apart and molded back together by experiencing the deep unending love of Christ. I have worked alongside of coal miners, housewives, teachers, insurance salesmen, pedaphiles, theifs, and rapists. I have talked with blunt racists and silent gossipers. Through my interactions with these many people I have been able to confront my own sin, my own dillusion, and my own pride.

I have been able to see the love of Christ for what it is, and not for what we have all made it out to be.

And that is where the compassion of Christ has seeped into my heart and into my mind. I have been shown my own short comings in serving other people and have been given the opportunity to keep my judgements to myself. While, this is not always the case, and I am often found in fault for judging, I have gotten soft. My heart has less ridges on it's edges. I cry more than I rage. I feel pity for the lost rather than feeling enraged by their ignorance. I pray more than I talk. I find myself longing and craving for silence.

I do not long to be a saint, or anything else for that matter. I long to see the divine in this world. To touch, feel, taste, and smell the love of Christ for all of humanity. I long to follow the Spirit on day at a time.

And I pray I can stop worrying, stop strategizing, and stop fussing over the Gospel, and I can start immersing my life in the stories and scriptures of Jesus. I pray the compassion and humility I have been dragged through can be a powerful witness of the transforming power of the Trinity. And I pray that the humility that I face on a daily basis can be evidence of the Divine in both pain and beauty.