"Thus I chose Jesus as my heaven, though at that time I saw him only in pain. I was satisfied by no heaven but Jesus, who will be my bliss when I am there. And it has always been a comfort to me that I chose Jesus for my heaven in all this time of suffering and sorrow. And that has been a lesson to me, that I should do so for evermore, choosing him alone for my heaven in good and bad times." Revelations of Dinice Love-Julian of Norwich.

I read this idea in words before I actually read it from Julian. I was reading my friend Nick's sermon for junior high camp and he had this idea.

I will decide now, while I am in this moment, who I will cling to when I am famished and lost. I will decide now, while I am in this moment, who I will cling to when I have no hope. I will decide now, while I am in this moment, how I will treat other people when I am immersed in sorrow and shame.

Do not ask me to lead or to preach or to teach without my Christ. I cling to the cross that he hung on as a testament to the death I must die everyday and I yearn to live a new life with Him. I have been lost in time and space seeking a new fad to wear when I have been called to be clothed in "compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience..."Colossians 3:12

I get so lost in the violence of my heart that it verbalizes itself as fire from my mouth. I so long for Jesus. I so long for His touch, His voice and His presence.

I have decided that He is my Heaven. That I will see Him in the good and in the bad. My eyes will not be adverted to the falsities around me but to the truth that is captured in the eyes of my Saviour.

The decision has been made. The death has been taken. The life has been gifted, and I have stood in the place where I am marked and will not be shaken. By earth, by air, or by sea my allegiance lies with the King of the World.